Enough to break your heart

I should have just kept her home. When my daughter came home Friday, that’s what went through my mind when she told me she was left in a room for over two hours while the entire rest of her grade went on to enjoy “Fun day”.

She had a dental appointment that morning, but I thought she should try to get at least half her day at school after. Then she came home and told me that she was sent to a classroom with two other students, supervised by one teacher, who made it seem more like in-school suspension.

Apparently the students were told of this “incentive” at the beginning of the year, and told they’d only be allowed to participate if they had a high enough grade. Well and good for any neurotypical kid, but when you have an autistic child who’s struggling in multiple subjects, and failing three classes, primarily because of the school’s archaic teaching methods and shoddy communication with the parents, this is problematic.

It’s like beating a puppy for puddling on the new carpet – three weeks after the event happened. The puppy in this case being my own kid, and her short-term memory is abysmal thanks to Autism.

We were just in an IEP meeting Wednesday for this, and the whole team agreed to let her make-up the work she hadn’t handed in, given the fact that the reason she hadn’t done so was because she needed help with learning!

So they stuck her in this room with a teacher with the admonition to complete her missing work.

We were told we’d be given parent codes to log in to the school’s app so we could find her missing assignments and help her on the weekend until she’s caught up. She didn’t know where to even find this information on her laptop, and when she tried to tell the teacher she didn’t know what she was supposed to work on, the teacher smirked at her and dismissed her with the pithy remark, “I bet you do.”

So she sat there for over 2 fucking hours, unable to do anything, not allowed to talk, until the end of the day. This is what she wrote, which I saw when she got home.

“I don’t know what I need to work on. I need some help.” My heart shattered.

I should have just kept her home.


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